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Everyone in This Room Will Someday Be Dead

A Novel

ebook
0 of 1 copy available
Wait time: About 4 weeks
0 of 1 copy available
Wait time: About 4 weeks
In this "fun, page-turner of a novel" (Sarah Haywood, New York Times bestselling author) that's perfect for fans of Mostly Dead Things and Goodbye, Vitamin, a morbidly anxious young woman stumbles into a job as a receptionist at a Catholic church and soon finds herself obsessed with her predecessor's mysterious death.
Gilda, a twenty-something, atheist, animal-loving lesbian, cannot stop ruminating about death. Desperate for relief from her panicky mind and alienated from her repressive family, she responds to a flyer for free therapy at a local Catholic church, and finds herself being greeted by Father Jeff, who assumes she's there for a job interview. Too embarrassed to correct him, Gilda is abruptly hired to replace the recently deceased receptionist Grace.

In between trying to memorize the lines to Catholic mass, hiding the fact that she has a new girlfriend, and erecting a dirty dish tower in her crumbling apartment, Gilda strikes up an email correspondence with Grace's old friend. She can't bear to ignore the kindly old woman who has been trying to reach her friend through the church inbox, but she also can't bring herself to break the bad news. Desperate, she begins impersonating Grace via email. But when the police discover suspicious circumstances surrounding Grace's death, Gilda may have to finally reveal the truth of her mortifying existence.

With a "kindhearted heroine we all need right now" (Courtney Maum, New York Times bestselling author), Everyone in This Room Will Someday Be Dead is a crackling and "delightfully weird reminder that we will one day turn to dust and that yes, this is depressing, but it's also what makes life beautiful" (Jean Kyoung Frazier, author of Pizza Girl).
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    • Library Journal

      February 1, 2021

      An atheist lesbian in her twenties, Gilda is inadvertently hired to replace recently deceased receptionist Grace at the local Catholic Church. When an old friend of Grace keeps emailing, Gilda ends up impersonating her--a big problem when it appears that Grace died under suspicious circumstances. A buzzing debut with a 100,000-copy first printing.

      Copyright 2021 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

    • Publisher's Weekly

      May 3, 2021
      Runaway humor sustains an otherwise grim story in Austin’s exuberant debut. After a car accident in which 27-year-old Gilda breaks her arm, she visits an emergency room where she’s a frequent patient, then responds to an ad offering free mental health support at a church. There, a priest mistakes her for a job applicant, and she doesn’t correct him. After the interview, Gilda accidentally becomes a receptionist, taking over for the late Grace Moppet, who may have been the victim of a homicidal nurse. As the receptionist, Gilda rapidly falls prey to impostor syndrome, a problem she faced during her last job as a bookseller (“I didn’t really get 1984 and... I hate poetry”). Meanwhile, Gilda, an atheist and a lesbian, makes awkward attempts to masquerade as a good Catholic, mistaking communion wafers for crackers, trying to understand hymns, catechism, baptism, and the blessed sacrament of confession. The plot thickens as Gilda responds to emails from one of her predecessor’s friends as Grace. What starts out as genuinely bleak affair, with a depressed Gilda considering suicide, becomes a brisk story underpinned by a vibrant cast. Fans of Helene Tursten’s An Elderly Lady Is Up to No Good will find much to enjoy.

    • Kirkus

      June 15, 2021
      An atheist lesbian finds herself working as a receptionist at a Catholic church. Unemployed and riddled with anxiety, 20-something Gilda impulsively responds to an ad offering free mental health services at a Catholic church. When she arrives, Father Jeff assumes she's there for a job interview, since he needs to replace the recently deceased receptionist, an old woman named Grace, and Gilda doesn't correct him. Much to her surprise, she gets the job. Her avoidant tendencies and oddball solutions are made extremely evident when she continues an email correspondence with Grace's old friend rather than share the bad news of her death. Gilda's internal monologue is weighed down with meditations on death and crippling imposter syndrome. Some readers will find it hilariously relatable while others might find it superfluous and aggravating. Gilda's ignorance when it comes to the rituals of the Catholic Church and her bumbling attempts to blend in at work are some of the funniest passages in this dark but funny novel ("I am starting to doubt my atheism because this might be proof that God exists and hates me"). An additional layer of intrigue comes around halfway through the novel when the police begin investigating Grace's death, further complicating Gilda's situation. The secondary characters add lightness to the story despite Gilda's constant thoughts of death, offering a reprieve from her internal monologue. Readers will find themselves rooting for the lovable but traumatized heroine.

      COPYRIGHT(2021) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

    • Booklist

      July 1, 2021
      Gilda survives a car crash as Austin's seriocomic tale opens. She gets herself to the ER, where she's already on a first-name basis with the staff, which tells you a lot about Gilda. Following the address on a flyer offering help with anxiety (the usual reason for her ER visits), Gilda is surprised to arrive at a church, and further surprised to walk out with a job as the church's receptionist. She needs a job so she decides she'll stay, which means, among other things, responding as Grace, the recently deceased former receptionist, to emails from Grace's old friend, Rosemary. As Gilda navigates her new job and a series of small-to-large intrigues, readers begin to understand the circumstances that have shaped her present moment: obsessing over life's endings, avoiding uncomfortable situations yet deeply uncomfortable nonetheless, and barely responding to her sweet girlfriend, Eleanor. Austin offers readers deep access into Gilda's mind, relating well the experience of living with anxiety without turning it into a pathology: Gilda is lovably just who she is, and readers will appreciate her.

      COPYRIGHT(2021) Booklist, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

    • Library Journal

      April 1, 2021

      DEBUT Gilda is depressed, and panic attacks send her to the local ER so often that she is on a first-name basis with the janitor. When she loses her job for failing to show up, her lack of money becomes a problem. A flyer offering mental health support takes her to a Catholic church, where she is mistaken for an applicant for the position of church secretary. The previous secretary, Grace, has died recently and might have been murdered. Gilda takes the job and, while catching up on the church's email, finds messages from Grace's friend Rosemary. She can't bring herself to tell Rosemary that Grace is dead, so she begins sending emails impersonating Grace. Then she decides to investigate Grace's death and ends up stalking the parish priest and an elderly parishioner--strange behavior that makes her a person of interest in the police investigation and lands her in jail. In the end, though, Gilda is exonerated and is able to resurrect her life. VERDICT Austin uses seasons in the church calendar to identify stages in Gilda's journey, moving from Advent to Easter as she captures the essence of Gilda's angst and redemption. Along the way, her characters are hilarious, relatable, exasperating, and endearing. For all readers of fiction.--Joanna Burkhardt, Univ. of Rhode Island Libs., Providence

      Copyright 2021 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

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